Practicing Wisdom: The Perfection of Shantideva's Bodhisattva Way

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In Zen and the Art of Helping David Brandon argued that ‘The real kernel of all our help, that which renders it effective, is compassion’ (1990: 6). He continues:

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Individuals who are more self-compassionate tend to have greater happiness, life satisfaction and motivation, better relationships and physical health, and less anxiety and depression. They also have the resilience needed to cope with stressful life events such as divorce, health crises, academic failure, and even combat trauma. Empathy is being able to perceive others’ feelings (and to recognize our own emotions), to imagine why someone might be feeling a certain way, and to have concern for their welfare. Once empathy is activated, compassionate action is the most logical response. Many confuse empathy (feeling with someone) with sympathy (feeling sorry for someone). Empathy Can Be Taught Egan, Gerald (2002) The Skilled Helper – A problem-management and opportunity-development approach to helping 7e, Wadsworth.Y: Your response. Riess is not talking about what you’ll say next, but how you resonate with the person you are talking to. Whether or not we’re aware of it, we tend to sync up emotionally with people, and how well we do it plays a role in how much we understand them. How to Care Deeply Without Burning Out Evidence-Based Practices. The concept of evidence-based practices (EBPs)is pretty much what it sounds like: practices based on empirical evidence. When professional practices are based on evidence, practitioners utilize empirical evidence concerning the outcomes of specific intervention approaches as the basis for designing their own interventions. The key to EBPs is that the practices utilized have an evidence base supporting their use, and that they are being implemented with a good deal of fidelity to the interventions as originally studied. The more there is “drift” from the studied intervention, the less relevant the supporting evidence becomes, and the more the practices look to be evidence-informed (EIPs) rather than evidence-based practices (EBPs). We can see that this definition can apply to a counselling-client, parent-child and educator-learner relationship. In other words, Carl Rogers understood that counselling relationships, for example, were just special instances of interpersonal relationships in general ( op. cit.: 39). Furthermore, he concluded that ‘the degree to which I can create relationships which facilitate the growth of others as separate persons is a measure of the growth I have achieved in myself’ ( op. cit.: 56) Notice your tone. If there’s emotional content, pay close attention to how the shaping of the words can create a tone. If you have bursts of short sentences, for example, it can sound like you’re being brusque and angry.

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Open body language, such as arms and legs not crossed (and certainly no distractions, like a cell phone, in your hands!).We allow by simply pausing with the intention to relax our resistance and let the experience be just as it is. Allowing our thoughts, emotions, or bodily sensations simply to be doesn’t mean we agree with our conviction that we’re unworthy. A related argument concerns high caseloads (Gibbs & Gambrill, 2002) and that a practitioner may not be paid for the time spent in this aspect of practice since it is not “face time” spent with clients. Social workers should be advocating for these activities to be reimbursable as client-services. Regardless, our professional code of ethics requires social workers “…to search for practice-related research findings and to share what is found with clients (including nothing)” (Gibbs & Gambrill, 2002, p. 463). It is a professional activity engaged on behalf of, and perhaps with, clients.

Chapter 2: Practical Wisdom – Core Teaching Skills Chapter 2: Practical Wisdom – Core Teaching Skills

Stage III: What do I have to do to get what I need or want? Helping clients develop strategies for accomplishing goals.

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As mentioned in the introduction, wisdom is gained through life experience. To keep growing as an individual, you must be willing to explore unfamiliar and sometimes uncomfortable things. The processes and approach to helping that is being discussed here overlaps a lot with what we know as informal education– but it also goes beyond it. Helpers are concerned with learning, relationship and working with people to act on their understandings. However, they also step over into the world of counselling. They do this by being experienced as a particular kind of person and drawing upon certain skills, not by taking on the persona of counsellor (British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy 2002; Higson 2004). Counselling entails a more formalized relationship than what we are talking about as helping; and is based in a specific set of traditions of thinking and practice. Thus, the helping relationship in the context of therapy and counselling feels and looks different to the helping relationship in the context of pastoral care or housing support – but more of this later. The helping person – caring, committed and wise Although many people get by in life by taking a self-centered approach, you won’t gain as much wisdom by doing so. Instead of focusing on yourself, take a look at others and listen because there is plenty to learn.