Taking Charge of Her Marriage: A FLR Tale of Spanking, Figging, and Pegging

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I hate it when he looks at the floor and mutters a response to my questions in a voice so low no normally hearing-able person can discern. “I’m sorry, baby, I couldn’t hear you. Did you say that I spanked you right there in front of our friends?” When we communicate dramatically and emotionally to ourselves, we make the problem even more intractable. Rather, she was making it clear that even if I was riled up about something, and even if I might actually have a point, that didn’t relieve me of the obligation to raise it respectfully and give her a reasonable opportunity to respond. That’s close to what you said. Your actual outburst was ruder. But that aside, were those two claims true? Were you not acting childish sassing me? And were you managing your drinking within the limits I established?”

Spankings of every level of severity have psychological benefit for training your man, regardless of his ability to maintain his emotional composure. It is also true that you will never make more valuable progress in training through spanking than every time you push him beyond his threshold for tears. Not every spanking needs to be about whether he cries or not, and certainly your interest in reaching tears may vary greatly from one type of spanking to another. Some women believe spanking to tears is too much, while others believe that reaching tears is a sign the spanking has worked and should end. Still others believe that spanking is just warm up until tears are reached, and only then does the actual teaching spanking begin. No matter how serious you are about spanking, remember to break your man in over time, and not to go from zero to sixty right away. Once your man has accepted your chastity control, and submitted to your spankings, a new opportunity for growth, obedience, and happiness awaits both partners. You can directly influence your man's way of thinking by applying relaxed, hypnotic like situations, combined with immobility and repetitive spanking. You can target specific behavior, or general attitude, by repeating a simple, memorable phrase as you apply the technique. Continue with as little interruption or deviation as possible, as far past his comfort level as possible, and you should observe a direct conditioned response to your training. For best results, reinforce your lesson by multiple sessions. This is a strong method for performance improvement, self improvement, behavior modification, and emotional release. It can also be a powerful tool for stress reduction, both in the mind of your man and on your relationship as a whole. You need not use this method to correct behavior, or to indoctrinate, as it is just as effective in teaching positives as it is negatives. This is not brainwashing, or some holywood version of mind control, so don't expect your man to become mindless. You can expect him to reflect deeply about himself, examine his own goals and motivations, and to begin to change his own mind about his actions or attitudes. Disciplinary spankings, also known as punishment spankings, or corporal punishment, are usually less common than maintenance spankings, but are perhaps the most essential. They establish you as the source of the pain he fears as well as the pleasure he craves, motivating his entire mindset. It is vital that he understands that serious matters have serious consequences, and that it is as important not to displease you as it is to please you. Always make sure he knows why he is being punished, so he can learn from his mistake, correct his behavior, grow as person, and strengthen your relationship. For best results, make certain the spanking is severe enough that he learns the lesson. The frequency of disciplinary spankings varies depending on how minor an infraction you wish to punish, but for most who reserve such spankings for more major incidents, these spankings should be infrequent, and more so the longer he is yours. The intensity and duration of these spankings also varies depending on the severity and nature of his infraction, but generally speaking range from mid to extreme.

DD Our Way

In fact, many if not most of us say that we want her to have the sole discretion to determine whether a disciplinary spanking has been earned. The couple may have agreements or understandings around the kind of behavior that is presumed to be punishable, but she gets to decide when the agreed-upon rules or standards have been transgressed and whether to do something about it. No, baby, you’ve been a good husband lately. I know you’ve been trying hard, and I’m proud of you. But darling, are you allowed to question me when I tell you to bring me the paddle?”

Then I spanked you with my sandal until you showed genuine remorse. I might have felt sorry for you and even saved your correction until after our guests were gone, if I had not warned you repeatedly of the consequences of sassing me in public. So, what happened next?” Thus, our need for something that feels “real” leads us to want something that, while consensual in the broad sense, doesn’t entail a lot of advance boundary-drawing and very little ongoing control from us. The plain fact is, many men in these relationships want it to feel like discipline is imposed, i.e., that it’s going to happen whether they like it or not.

A Married Woman's Guide to a happier more fulfilling relationship

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Punishment is often physical but may also be non-physical, a withdrawal of certain rights for example. Discipline is all about the rules and behaviours I expect which cement my authority but may also involve physical spanking. Why do they seem to crave a situation that feels like their wives are imposing it on them unilaterally whether they like it or not?

The Razor Strap (Strop)

It is hard to say for sure how common a FLR might be, but since we began to explore it several years ago, there is certainly a lot more information available on the subject today information on FLR is enormous compared to what was available just a few years ago. We sense that it is becoming more and more common, and is rapidly growing in popularity. I got resentful, and probably a little jealous, about one particular way she was spending her time and who she was spending it with. Instead of communicating how I was feeling, I let it fester until, when the issue arose again, I cut loose with a snippy comment. Things escalated from there into a full-blown argument and going to bed angry. Which is rare for us. Note that she didn’t ask me whether I agreed with her decision that a spanking was coming. Rather, she asked me whether I agreed with the underlying facts. After that, the decision on how to proceed was all hers.