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The Man Who Mistook His Job for His Life: How to Thrive at Work by Leaving Your Emotional Baggage Behind

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In a highly volatile situation, it is all too easy to overestimate your part in what has happened when it may well be a product of the dysfunctional organisation, or simply down to individual behaviour: a bullying boss or a toxic colleague. Often the culprit is successful and charismatic and this only adds to the confusion. Much more compelling are the glimpses of Shragai’s own life: “dying” on stage in her former career as a standup comedian; memories of her Hungarian father, who was liberated from Auschwitz, acquired a mobile home park in California, lost all the money he made and spent his last years doing charity work dressed as Santa Claus. Shragai has clearly had a fascinating life and I wanted to hear about more of it. She has certainly had a more interesting time than most of the clients she describes.

A must read for those who care about the human side of work, which should be all of us. She brings her deep understanding of human behaviour to this wise and illuminating – and eminently readable – account of some of the most common situations in the workplace. Clearly experienced in the ways of leaders and their teams, Shragai offers insights as well as practical suggestions for how to deal with those difficult people and interactions that are usually so vexing and that detract from finding satisfaction in the office. She also inspires curiosity about ourselves and about what work means to us, and how we play out old dramas on the stage of work everyday. Is 2023 the year you want to change your working life? Perhaps you want to stop catastrophising about small mistakes, instil a better job/life balance or find new mechanisms to cope with a nightmare boss. Solutions to these problems, as well as an array of other office issues, are what Naomi Shragai offers in Work Therapy. […] as the book went on I realised Shragai was right: assuming you want to stay in the job with the bad boss, you’re going to have to learn to handle them. It’s not fair — and you hope they’ll have their comeuppance — but you are the only factor over which you have complete control. […] there is a lot of wisdom here… If you’re searching for a new way to handle office politics, you could well find the answers in this book.”The book also highlights the importance of effective communication skills in building healthy work relationships. This includes not only verbal communication but also non-verbal cues such as body language and tone of voice. Shragai suggests that being open, honest, and empathetic in communication helps in forming trust and understanding among team members. It’s about expressing oneself clearly and respectfully, while also being receptive to others’ viewpoints and emotions.

Shragai also discusses the ripple effect of positive workplace relationships. When individuals work on their emotional issues and improve their interactions with colleagues, it can lead to a more positive and productive work environment overall. This includes reduced stress levels, increased job satisfaction, and higher team morale.What experience do you want [leavers] to walk out the door with — and what do you want them to tell the next 10 people? Karen Thomas-Bland The book also discusses how leaders’ emotional intelligence can transform organizational culture. When leaders demonstrate empathy, understanding, and emotional regulation, it sets a positive example for the entire organization. This can create a work environment where open communication, mutual respect, and emotional support are valued. Such an environment not only improves employee morale and job satisfaction but also enhances overall productivity and teamwork. Our The Men's Book Breakfast ~ The MBB team is getting deeper with James Clear's book, Atomic Habits. This Saturday we had an animated and very enlightening conversation. Michael’s psychological make-up was such that he was forever striving to accommodate and work harder when things got tough, but this only aggravated matters. The learning curve for him was recognising that regardless of his commitment, drive and integrity, he was never going to thrive in this particular organisation. Eventually, he was able to walk away knowing the failure was not his.

urn:lcp:manwhomistookhis00jona:epub:b3dfe97e-d4d1-4692-8757-59f376611c9c Extramarc Duke University Libraries Foldoutcount 0 Identifier manwhomistookhis00jona Identifier-ark ark:/13960/t7sn48c81 Invoice 1213 Isbn 0609608460 This past sunday, 22-October-2022, Group T282 of The Men's Book Breakfast ~ The MBB held its second last session discussing chapter 8 & 9 of Naomi Shragai's book, @The man who mistook his job for his life. Moreover, the author highlights how cultivating these skills can have a ripple effect on the overall workplace culture. A work environment where emotional intelligence is valued and promoted can lead to higher levels of employee engagement, satisfaction, and retention. It fosters a culture of respect, understanding, and open communication, which are essential for a thriving workplace. While the prospect of leaving might be daunting to some, especially if their confidence has plummeted, it is far easier to leave a toxic situation than to recover from its damaging long-term effects. Work is emotional. But the foundational fiction of jobs - that they are separate from the people who do them - causes grief and frustration every day. The gift of this book is to help us understand who we are, who our co-workers are, in the round, as flesh and blood, not economic units of production. It can help managers and the managed, bosses and the bossed, to find in work and in each other the humanity and warmth, growth and forgiveness that this crucial part of our lives deserves. * Margaret Heffernan, author of Wilful Blindness *Feel confident in saying ‘no’ if the office housework always comes to you and advise the requestor of the last time(s) you did it. Also explain that doing this work will take your time away from your core responsibilities. The book emphasizes the concept of setting clear boundaries as a key strategy for achieving work-life balance. Shragai suggests practical steps such as designating specific times for work and personal activities, learning to say no to unreasonable work demands, and prioritizing self-care. These actions help individuals reclaim control over their time and energy, allowing them to be more present and effective in both work and personal life. Shragai also emphasizes the importance of setting boundaries between personal and professional life. This includes recognizing the need for breaks, setting aside time for self-care, and learning to say no to excessive work demands. Establishing clear boundaries helps in maintaining emotional equilibrium and prevents work-related stress from spilling over into personal life.

Hunting is hard. You have to run fast, for miles, often in the heat of the day. You have to keep your eyes fixed firmly on your prey. You have to cooperate with your fellow hunters, because if you don’t, you won’t eat. The apprenticeship, says Jan Lucassen in The Story of Work, is long. “With an AK47,” he says, quoting the influential archaeologist Lewis Binford, “you don’t have to know so much!” But most humans have had to. For 98% of human history, hunting and gathering has been our work. Work was never a picnic and it isn’t now.

It's much easier to build habits around your natural flow of things. For example, if you want to be attending a gym regularly, identify a gym that is along your route to work and does not introduce a sudden deviation to your usual routines.

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