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All My Friends Are Invisible: the inspirational childhood memoir

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In this remarkable book, Jonathan Joly, known widely as one of social media's most successful content creators, shares the secret he's kept hidden for many years: the beautiful world he has retreated to time and time again when life was unbearable, populated by his invisible friends This extraordinary childhood memoir is not only an important, thought-provoking and exhilarating read, it gives hope and community for all those who have ever felt 'other', and proves how vital it is to provide children with the safe space to be themselves. It's more of a fictional story. A hot topic, I agree, of childhood trauma and the longterm issues it can inflict upon us but not entirely convinced of the accuracy of all of the events described in the story, which can lead us to wonder how much has been exaggerated. That's not to say it is intentionally done. I have family members whose imaginations (not memories- there is a difference) can recall specific details about occasions of years gone by, which ultimately just did not happen. As children we often drift in our thoughts/ daydream etc for various reasons (esp children with ADHD) and I can see how it could be possible to confuse actual memories with such occasions, especially from early childhood.

I confess that I've never heard of Jonathan Joly, so had up Google him. Turns out he is part of a famous YouTube family, just one I've never heard of. Because growing up in conservative 1980s Dublin, where there was little tolerance for children who were 'different', Jonathan Joly was, indeed, a different sort of child: creative, expressive, and - on the inside - a girl. The limitations of the people around him to understand his differences led to years of tyrannical bullying and abuse, forcing him to withdraw within himself to the point of clinical absence. He documents feeling 'other' his whole life and not wanting to be a girl, however he doesn't really explain this very well. As I recall in the 80s and 90s, toys were all unisex and so were hobbies. I played football and tag with the boys and you wouldn't have seen me dead in a skirt, but nobody would ever have called me a boy. I never felt of myself as a boy. Joly seems to be talking of very cliché things here, eg doesn't want to play football as it's for boys, and doesn't want to go to a boys school as he gets on with girls better despite having friends and sisters outside of school. It's unsettling that he places so much emphasis on materialistic things being for boys and girls, which he says other people put onto him but again these seem innocuous things that I can't imagine anybody else having umbrage with.This extraordinary childhood memoir is not only an important, thought-provoking and exhilarating listen, it gives hope and community for all those who have ever felt 'other' and proves how vital it is to provide children with the safe space to be themselves. In summary, a short story to be read with a pinch of salt. If you are in need of sound mental health advice please seek it from reputable and professional sources. I am aware that the author suggests that people shouldn't seek mental health help as mental health issues "do not need to be fixed, but accepted". This is such a dangerous narrative. Mental health issues are not personality quirks that society should accept and encourage. They are illnesses which should be met with professional support and structured help. What Jonathan describes is concerning. I will not go into the specifics but encouraging his fans to accept these kind of hallucinations is truly worrying. A mesmeric, harrowing and uplifting childhood memoir that will open up much-needed conversations about identity and mental health*

Despite this, All My Friends Are Invisible is a well-paced and well-structured narrative. Certain scenes, such as one of confusion over the clumsy delivery of bad news, are deftly handled, humorous and suspenseful. I was intrigued when I saw this book, I wasn’t sure what to expect. My understanding is that this is Joly’s first book, and for that, it’s not bad. If this was written as fiction based on his life, I think it would read far better. I found it a little confusing. It’s autobiographical, almost written like a memoir, yet reads like a fictional book. There is in-depth description and constant dialogue. I really think that Joly could be a talented fictional author, perhaps in fantasy genre. I thought his story telling was captivating. Thank you for shining a light on ‘different’ children. Thank you for showing that there is no normal. But most of all thank you for proving that even when it’s hard to make friends…there is always someone looking out for you’ @gabrielle.reaThank you to Netgalley and Quercus Books for sending me an advanced copy in return for an honest review. This extraordinary childhood memoir is not only an important, thought-provoking and exhilarating read, it gives hope and community for all those who have ever felt ‘other’, and proves how vital it is to provide children with the safe space to be themselves. A mesmeric, harrowing and uplifting childhood memoir that will open up much-needed conversations about identity and mental health However, as this is supposed to be an account of Joly’s childhood, I find it so bizarre that he can retell his entire life from the age of 3 with such precision. For example, I couldn’t tell you what I wore when I was 3 and exactly what people said and did and how I felt. It seems odd. It makes you wonder the validity of it and makes it feel like a story. I think if needed to either be written as a memoir or a fictional book (based on a true story). It’s a messy combination of both. I’m not sure how an editor read this and thought it was a good idea? I enjoyed the book and thought it had an interesting narrative which helped the reader to understand how young Jonathan was feeling when he was an infant to teenager. The story gave me a very vivid picture of what Jonathan thoughts and feelings were at different stages and times in his life and how he felt about his family-in particular his father. Also, I enjoyed Jonathan talking about Ireland thright the 80s and into 90s and thought that added a touch of realism to the story.

This extraordinary and beautifully-written childhood memoir is not only an important, thought-provoking and exhilarating read, it provides hope and community for all those who have ever felt 'other', and proves how vital it is to provide children with the safe space to be themselves, the absence of which can have dire consequences.With reference to the writing, I found this very jumbled. The narrator voice seemed to jump with no rhyme or reason and it was hard to know when in time things were. Is this child Jonathan speaking, or adult Jonathan, currently writing the book, reflecting on child Jonathan’s thoughts - a different font or colour perhaps may have helped here.

A mesmeric, harrowing and uplifting childhood memoir that will open up much-needed conversations about identity and mental health. Ambiguous Gender Identity: Jonathan Joly identifies as non-binary, meaning that he does not conform to either the binary gender identity of male or female. He reveals that he played with girls' toys, thought of himself as a girl and was bullied for his non-conforming gender identity in school.

A mesmeric, harrowing and ultimately uplifting childhood memoir about identity, family and mental health that has touched so many readers around the world*

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